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When Social Media Leaves You in Tears

September 7, 2011

  Have you ever had your words twisted online, so much that it left you in tears?

Have you ever felt under attack because of something you posted online, whether it be a Facebook update, a post, or a tweet?

I have.

Literally now more than once now, I sat at my computer in tears.

So many times words, inside jokes, something meant in jest can be taken and made into something it is not.

So how do you handle it, when your words get twisted?

Here is how I handle it:

1. First I breathe and let the tears flow. Sometimes I have even been known to go take a hot shower, a walk, or make a cup of tea.

2. I don’t get defensive, and if it came across and was misinterpreted I apologize quickly and get my real point across as quickly as I can. Words are easy to twist. The emotion and intent behind the words are not always at the surface, unless you know the writer very well.

3. Sometimes I realize it is okay to take a break away from Social Media, in fact on this blog I have taken long extended breaks when I needed to step back, look after stuff that really mattered to me and then was able to give back in the blogosphere.

4. Surround yourself with real people who know you both on and offline, so when you say something, they know how you meant it, and know your heart. They can be great friends and supports especially when you feel already bad enough.

5. Remind yourself to think twice about what you tweet, update, or post as how you say it, that joke, or tease, may seem hurtful to some and those harsh words of criticism they too can leave someone in tears.

These are the ways I get through those moments when people think I am rude, unkind or even worse, because if you know me well you know my heart and intent is never to be unkind, because in my opinion kindness, consideration, thoughtfullness all matter. Just sometimes it needs to be applied a little more. How do you get through them?

One Comment leave one →
  1. September 7, 2011 6:00 pm

    My Dear,

    I’m taking a much needed break to respond to you. I do not know you offline, but I like you for the things you present online and how you present it. We do not talk often, but I’ve developed an online trust with you.

    I do not share my work life online, but I work my ass off day in and day out. I am a very trusted person with the people who I work with and work for. I take my work seriously. I do a lot of social media for many people around the KW area. I do not gloat about it, but I share this thing with you for one reason. We all make mistakes and poor judgments at times online and off. Don’t be so hard on yourself.

    In my years in business, I’ve come to realize that there are people who can say things out of context and there are people that can’t. I can’t for whatever reason, and I’ve learned that a long time ago. People take what I have to say WAY too seriously. However, it’s OK because I’ve come to realize that those who can say things out of context are not taken as seriously professionally either.

    For those who wrote things to provoke you to write this post, it’s just a continuation to crap. They want you to lay in it, cry in it, and eat it too. Is that what we teach our kids?

    Trust me, nothing you said will ever diminish the reputation of this successful business woman in question. She’s successful in her own right. I’m almost 100% sure that other people thought, what you said aloud. However, with that said, ignore it and believe that this woman works hard enough to know better. I admire her greatly, but I do not admire that she supported the views of some.

    If these people trusted you into their world prior to this incident, the whole situation should have been dropped at your initial apology. We teach our kid’s to apologize and move on. We need to do that as adults as well.

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